As men, we are drawn to others we can relate to, that have been where we’ve been or possibly even look like us. That has been my experience. We say things like “That’s my dude” or “He’s my people”. A common thread is shared. A person will resonate even more if they are achieving some of the goals you have your sights on. You may even realize that you’ve stumbled upon the “Secret to Success” when a common theme is shared enough times, by a multitude of people who are totally different.
The stories from Everyday Dads can be extremely motivating and practical in approach, but nothing beats access to Experts. A heavy dose of “Bro-talk” from the untrained and unstudied can also lead you astray, spinning your wheels with no results. This could do a number on your motivation and have you right back on the couch proclaiming NOTHING WORKS! The right expert can get you back right! Or just give you the extra UMPH that you need.
I coach dads for a living full-time as well as train several people in-person. Most of what I do consists of leading groups, organizing and running fitness challenges, and creating content for my paid members.
Steve Roy
Ask An Active-Dad has become known for featuring both Everyday Dads like Eric Heinze, and Experts like Brazilian Jiu Jitsu Black Belt Diogo Gomes. It’s all about perspective.
Coronavirus may have a hold on our physical networking capabilities, but that’s why Al Gore invented the internet and why Zuckerberg stole the idea for Facebook. Again, it’s all about perspective. Which is why I am excited to introduce to you another Expert with a unique perspective.
Steve Roy is a father of two beautiful daughters and knows a thing or TEN THOUSAND about Prioritizing Physical Activity…our favorite subject.
Therefore, I will say no more…
I asked Steve Roy about his experience as an Everyday Active-Dad, with EXPERT TIPS dripping all over them!
- What is your physical fitness background? Did you play sports growing up? Were you physically active throughout your life or is this a fairly new passion that came along with your profession? Ironically, I was super dorky throughout middle and high school. I was short and rail thin and didn’t even hit puberty until I was 19 or 20. It was bad. I didn’t play sports, exercise, or even date until I was out of high school. I was very introverted, shy, and pretty much afraid of my own shadow. It wasn’t until I started going to the gym when I was in my early twenties that I started to change physically. Once I started to see significant changes, I joined a gym and then became a certified personal trainer. That was in 1997 and I’ve dedicated myself to fitness ever since.
- What EXACTLY is your profession and what does your daily schedule consist of? I coach dads for a living full-time as well as train several people in-person. Most of what I do consists of leading groups, organizing and running fitness challenges, and creating content for my paid members. My day fluctuates a lot and much of it is spent in front of a computer editing videos, creating social media content, and marketing. The rest is spent either exercising, shooting video footage, or incorporating both. I have my daughters every other week, so when I have them, I spent much more time on outdoor activities like hiking, biking, and playing sports.
- How big is your immediate family and how old are your children? It’s me, my girlfriend Shenan of almost 7 years, and my 2 daughters Georgia (almost 15) and Lily 11. We’ve been living together for 6 years and the girls are very close to her and look to her as a step mother.
- Are your kids physically active? If yes, how so? Before all the COVID stuff, both girls were involved in softball and going to classes at the gym. We spend a few hours a day outside doing something active and often, it’s just games we make up and have fun with. Kids don’t love exercise inherently, so I make it interesting and fun for them. And instead of just telling them to go play, I play with them. It gets all of us active and also give us experiences. Plus, I want to always lead by example.
- Throughout your stages of fatherhood, what are some things you just could not do without to stay consistently active? For example, when your child was an infant, what did you use to keep you going? When your child became a toddler, a pre-schooler, etc. Honestly, I struggled to get to the gym when my girls were small, and I was working 14+ hour days and was constantly drained. I would get up at 4:45am, drive 45 minutes to train 2 clients, then turn around and drive back in order to work my full-time job as a financial advisor. A few nights a week I would also teach a boot camp class outside at a local park and would get home around 7, just in time to help get the girls ready for bed. It was keeping a few personal training clients and teaching my classes that kept me accountable because I was sitting all day and didn’t have a lot of energy.
- What motivates you to prioritize physical activity? First and foremost, I want to be a role model for my girls. 60% of this country is overweight and I want to show them and teach them why it’s so important to stay fit and healthy. I lead by example instead of preaching to them. They learn by watching me. Secondly, my mother lived a very unhealthy and sedentary life and I watched her die at only 70. That scares me. I want to live vibrantly for many more years and at 48, I’m no spring chicken. Being strong, lean, fit, energetic, and moving well is very important to me.
- What has been your biggest challenges in prioritizing physical activity? (If you can, break it down in stages of fatherhood) How did you overcome them? How do you suggest others overcome them? The hardest times were when I got separated from my wife if 8.5 years in 2012. I was away from my girls for the first time and being a very active dads, it crushed me not to be able to see them every day. I only got to see them on the weekends and because of the overwhelming sadness I felt, I turned to food to ease my emotional pain. I would literally eat McDonald’s every night, drink a 6 pack of Dr. Pepper and 2 Red Bulls every day along with Snickers bars and any other candy and fast food I could get my hands on. My body turned into a huge pile of crap after a few months like this and I spent a good 6 months or so eating like this in an effort to make myself feel better. It wasn’t until I ran into an old friend one day sat me down and told me I was being a lousy father and there was no way I could be the best dads I could be if I continued to abuse my body with junk food. She was right and it hit me hard. I made the decision that night to change and started cleaning up my diet and began exercising again. It took months of consistent work, but I finally started seeing and feeling a difference. I ran into that same friend 9 months later and she was shocked by the transformation I had made, both mentally and physically. I haven’t looked back since and am grateful for that conversation every day.
- What is the biggest reason for your success in prioritizing physical activity and why? Honestly, it’s because I do this for a living. If I didn’t it would be harder to stay so consistent with it. My entire business relies on me living and teaching a fit and healthy lifestyle and I can’t allow myself to slip. I have cravings, weaknesses for foods, and a wicked sweet tooth and could easily go down the path to eating the typical American diet, which is horrible. But I choose not to because I know I need to lead by example.
- What impact has physical activity had on your life? It’s changed everything for me. I could have easily been a skinny twerp my whole life had I not chosen to get into fitness in my twenties. It took me until age 30 to get myself over 160 pounds (I’m 6’0), and I was trying my hardest to gain weight. But adding all that muscle to my body back in the 90’s made all the difference with my confidence and my desire to start succeeding in different areas of my life.
- What suggestions would you give to people who say they “don’t have time for physical activity” and how do they stay motivated? Not having time is an excuse and just tells me that fitness isn’t a priority for them. People can’t be pushed into fitness and I believe need to be internally motivated or inspired to change. If someone isn’t ready to put in the work and make the sacrifices needed, then it’s not going to happen. I suggest taking a hard look at the reason why getting fit and healthy is important. If it’s not, that’s ok too but don’t use excuses to cover up for that.
- In your profession, what are some of the biggest and/or most common issues you have seen that could be prevented with physical activity? Well the first and most obvious is the problems associated with being overweight for a long time. Most of the time, it’s related directly to their nutrition and lifestyle. That’s it. I teach the basics and believe 100% that if you can just take a few simple principles and apply them consistently, you’ll make remarkable progress. Things like eating whole foods and avoiding the obvious crap you know is bad for you. Controlling your portions. Getting more sleep. Reducing stress. Moving as much as possible and sitting as little as possible. Replacing most of your drinks with plain water. Getting more fresh air and sunshine. Making strength training a priority. Simple things like these. Another is poor movement and recurring injuries and I tie these directly to a lack of dedicated mobility work and stretching. This is critical especially for guys in their 30’s and 40’s and beyond. Most guys don’t stretch because it’s boring. They want to get to the heavy weights and feed their egos. But taking even 10 minutes a day for specific work to help stretch your muscles and increase range of motion can keep you moving and feeling SO much better.
- Could you explain your business and what it provides its customers? Most of what I do revolves around community and that’s for a specific reason; men thrive in tribes. I’ve coached hundreds of individuals and also many more in groups and I’ve seen the difference it makes when you’re around a supportive group of like-minded people. It brings you up and holds you accountable much more than I can do alone. This is the reason I created the Fit Dad Nation Inner Circle, which is our private member community where dads level up their fitness games and lives. It’s accountability based with monthly challenges, programs, and a ton of interaction and engagement. The details are at fitdadnation.com/innercircle. I also developed a 90 program specifically for dads over 35 which is based on the fundamentals of healthy habits and consistent action. It’s helped a lot of guys turn their lives around and is a step by step program to dropping the “dad bod” and putting on some muscle. The details can be found here.
- How can people get in contact with you? My website is fitdadnation.com where you can find information on all out groups and program and I’d suggest starting by joining our free private Facebook group for dads at fitdadnation.com/community. I’m also on YouTube, Instagram, and Facebook @TheFitDadNation.
First and foremost, I want to be a role model for my girls. 60% of this country is overweight and I want to show them and teach them why it’s so important to stay fit and healthy. I lead by example instead of preaching to them. They learn by watching me.
Steve Roy
Wipe Your Sweat
Life happens fellas. Life happens FAST. There are three things that are guaranteed…death, taxes and challenges. Fellas, we have ups and downs in our work life, physical activity life, marriage and in fatherhood. But we get through it! Steve is an example of how we can emerge even better than ever! Get someone in your corner. Find your community!
Stay motivated, stay healthy, for you and your family. All dads should be ACTIVE-DADs